In the grand scheme of our lives, as children we learn early that what we do brings about results. Things like You play with fire-you get burnt, play into the learning process, to the vast majority of the people on this planet, these sayings are tools with which we learn to RESPECT certain things. Basically, we learn that actions have reactions or decisions have consequences which ultimately influence our entire lives. Unfortunately, some learn from first mistakes, others have to make more than one mistake to get IT(the classical conditioning process).
The younger we are, the more likely we are to be either rewarded for the right behavior or punished for the wrong behavior. Not everyone goes through the exact same processes, this is why we are all so different, good or bad. Human nature is too diverse to come to real conclusive statistics.
So, we have to say that most people have the tools placed in their cribs and after that everything is chance and fate.
Chance is the correlation between the outcome we want to achieve and the risks we take in the process. The more prepared you are with the calculated risks, the less likely the disappointment in the (un/desired) outcome.
Fate or destiny is something that is written in that invisible book above our heads, that have nothing to do with us. What is written for each and everyone of us, is unknown to all. No matter your own plans, life style, background, efforts or what have you, the end is not something you have any influence over(for example, some people smoke all their lives and die old in their sleep, others never smoke and die of lung cancer….you can take your chances/risks but you can get run over by a bus or a brick can fall from the sky on your head…just like that….curtain closed). So, we leave fate or destiny out of it.
Decisions also have to do with instincts and intuition, the gut feeling, sometimes expressed by our bodies with goosebumps or a fluttery feeling somewhere inside, but those come from a long string of experiences and can not be applied to everything.
Most importantly, we have to live with the consequences of our decisions. Blaming others for outcomes is just plain, irresponsible. Facing the facts and the truth, can help ensure that the same disappointing results will not take place again.
I, for one, have been at the receiving end of an extended series of bad decisions and have come to the conclusion(my decision), that I need to stay away from the individual who is causing them. Behavioral modification achieved!(I learned my lesson from his mistakes)! Case closed.
(Picture not my own)